Monday, November 2, 2009

God couldn't be everywhere at once, so he created moms....ahhhhh....

******I wrote this in July, when I was still pregnant to the MAX (as opposed to just looking like it, like, you know....NOW)*****

Somewhere in this pregnancy I stopped cleaning the house. No one noticed at first, so I just let it go. I keep up on the laundry, and do the dishes after I realize that leaving them in the sink until someone else notices them is doing me absolutely no good.

I DID mop the floors a week or two ago. Once. But really, they were still disgusting.

This was hard for me at first, because I usually keep a clean house. No joke folks, people envy me for my mad domestic skills. No joke.

But now? Not so much.

There is a bowling ball stuck to my midsection.

A three year old clinging to my right calf.

And an angry adolescent nagging at me from behind.

They all need something, NOW, which happens to be at the same time.

So first the make up went. Then the housekeeping.

Then? Sorry honey, but sex? Not so much.

Then my mom came over.

Cory and I left for a few hours- laundry fluffed and folded!

Floors cleaned, rinsed AND waxed.

Everything sparkled and glowed. The rugs were deodorized AND vacuumed.

The toilets were clean, the sinks were scrubbed.

AND she went grocery shopping for me.

At first I was totally embarrassed. OH MY GOD, my mom had to clean my house for me! I am the filthiest bum EVER.

But then I remembered- oh ya, this woman totally used to wipe my ass. AND she has been there for both gruesome bloody deliveries of those grand babies she loves so much.

But the poor hubs? There are still some things my mom won't do.

Damn it.