Sunday, January 18, 2009

OVERWEIGHT.

I have been at the doctors for this pregnancy 5,397,871 times.  It is, by far, the hardest one yet for me.  And that says a lot.  But at my last appointment, nothing was said about my weight. NOTHING.  So I thought- sweet.  Homegirl thinks I'm good to go.

Wrong.

When I got home and read the visit summary, under my diagnoses there were two things written.  One of those things was OVERWEIGHT.

Really?  Why do they have to effing capitalize it?!  I mean COME ON.

I get really big when I am pregnant.  REALLY BIG.  I birth very large children.  VERY LARGE.  I also continually repeat myself for emphasis.  FOR EMPHASIS.

So I am not that worried about it.  I always lose the weight after the baby, and so who really cares anyway.  As long as I watch what I eat, control my blood sugar, husband doesn't leave his big fat wife, and this baby is in the clear, than I am good.

In the meantime though- did you know that it is Meyer lemon season?!  You know what that means?  Meyer Lemon Custard Tarts.  They are everywhere!

Except in my mouth.

And that my friends, is a problem.

xoxo,
(The ever Expanding) J.Danger

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

coming up for air

glub.glub.

This past week has been busy.  And by busy I mostly mean me trying to sleep at every waking moment.  I am just so tired.  All of the time.  And I don't mean tired like, "Oh I am tired" I mean tired like falling asleep while driving tired, and looking like a drug addict in front of the school while waiting for dismissal. 

"Who's that woman passed out over there?"

"Oh the drooly one?"

"Yeah, did she overdose or something?!"

"Oh no, that's just Tommy's mom.  She does that all the time."

What the heck folks.  What the heck.

I checked in with my ole pal Google reader and found....327 posts!

Whoa guys.  Didn't you get the memo?  When I break, YOU break!  Right?  Otherwise I just fall behind.  You know, like in everything.  

Which is what happened!

And I blame YOU!

xoxo,
Getting fatter by the minute- J.Danger

Friday, January 9, 2009

I am a big fat cheater



I was tagged by Josh over at Raging Dad.  How awesome is that!

That tag was to post a picture of myself that I take right this very second, no editing, no primping, no nothin.  Well, I think that the point is to keep it real, as opposed to literally taking the picture.  So I am meeting in the middle.  Or just making up my own rules, however you see it.

Remember when I told you that we rode a four person bike-cart thingy over Thanksgiving.

Well here you have it.

Thanks Josh!

Monday, January 5, 2009

Anniversary

One year ago today...


Cory and I were married.


And I wouldn't have it any other way.

We are getting outta dodge to celebrate, so I will be back later in the week!

xoxo,
J.Danger

Sunday, January 4, 2009

I broke my streak

Damn it!  I was doing so well- blogging my butt off.

But what can you do?  I have been so busy lately telling the time.

On my NEW ROLEX!

Cha-ching-

Swear to sweet baby Jesus it is the real deal!

see-


I know, I know.  Try to contain yourself.  But hey- it is the closest I will ever get to owning one.  I actually now own five!

My dear love of a husband brought it home for me on New Years Eve.

Basically because I made him this deliciousness here-

Chicken Fricassee and Dumplings (oops, except if I give the recipe for the dumplings, my mom will be really mad.  I don't know about you, but I would like to live to meet the baby in my tummy)
Recipe from The Joy of Cooking

Have ready:
3 1/2 to 4 1/2 pounds chicken or turkey parts
Separate the legs into drumsticks and thighs; cut each breast diagonally in half through the bone.  If you wish, remove the skin (you should probably remove the skin).  Sprinkle the chicken with:
Salt and black pepper to taste
Heat in a large skillet over medium heat
1/2 a stick of butter
Place only as many chicken pieces in the pan as will fit without crowding and cook, turning once, until pale golden, 3 to 5 minutes on each side.  Remove the chicken to a plate and brown the remaining pieces in the same manner.  Add to the fat in the pan
1 1/2 cups chopped onions
Cook, stirring occasionally, until tender but not browned, about 5 mins.  Stir in
1/3 cup all-purpose flour
Cook, stirring for a minute, then reduce heat to medium low, and whisk in
1 3/4 cups chicken stock or broth or water
Whisking constantly, bring to a boil over high heat.  Add
8 ounces mushrooms, sliced
3 medium carrots, diced
2 Large ribs of celery, diced
1/2 teaspoon dried thyme
1 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon white or black pepper
Return the chicken pieces, with any accumulated juices, to the pan and bring to a simmer.  Reduce the heat so that the liquid barely bubbles.  Cover tightly and cook until the thighs register 180 on a thermometer, 20 to 30 minutes.  Skim the fat from around the sides with a spoon.  Stir in
1/4 to 1/2 cup heavy cream (I used milk)
season with-
salt and pepper
fresh lemon juice (I skipped this)
The sooner the chicken is served, the juicier it will be.
****************

It was really good.  I have been the worst wife ever this past week (or four) and so I figured it was about time that I showered and dressed myself and made a decent meal for my family.  Thank god for me it was good, otherwise I would have been still crying from the horrible chicken and all these damn hormones.

Side note- VERY IMPORTANT.  If you live in a two story house, and you happen to have to sleep upstairs, and not downstairs, in the room that is placed conveniently enough to catch all of your cooking odors, open up a damn window while you are cooking this meal.  Especially if you are knocked up, and just about everything from saltines to sardines makes you sick, because it would be really lame IF all night long all you could smell was dinner- fabulous or not- so thick in your room it is like clogging up your big fat pregnant nostrils, and you can't open a door because your toddler is sick and is sleeping with you, and the clean fresh air would just make him sicker, and so you leave the balcony door shut and slowly just breath the Chicken Fricassee air all night long, breath by breath, hoping that you do not suffocate and die, because then who would do all the dishes from dinner, oh and care for this sick toddler kicking you in your belly.  Just sayin.

xoxo,
The Ever Expanding J.Danger

Wednesday, December 31, 2008

So long, farewell.

Tracey, over HERE, did an end of the year meme and forced me to do one too-
. . . . .

1. What did you do in 2008 that you’d never done before?
Started my blog. duh.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I did keep my resolution this year, surprisingly enough!  It was to STOP multi-tasking and instead to just do one thing at a time, and to do it well and attentively.  I think I will just keep working on that one.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
SOOOO many people had babies this year.  It was a baby extravaganza!

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Cory lost a lot of friends this year.  So sad, so young.

5. What countries did you visit?
I was pathetic and lame this year and stayed in the country.  I am so not the jet setter.
But I did do a ton of traveling in the country.  Cleveland, Memphis, Nashville, New Orleans, Orlando, Miami, Las Vegas...

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
This here baby that I am a carryin.

7. What dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
January 5th- Cory made an honest woman outta me after all.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
School and the fact that I did not maim or kill myself or anyone in my home due to the stress of school and home.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Hmmm, I honestly don't know.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Does this incredibly horrible "morning" (my ass!) sickness count? Cuz it should.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
I think my MacBook.  Oy Vey. Consumerism at its best.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
I am going to say everyone here at home.  We have all made a ton of huge adjustments, and we are all doing well and being great at just being Team Danger (Name is Corny, Jessica Corny).

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
I am going to have to say that the majority of the political right (NOT ALL OF THEM) and people that struggle with accepting gender, race, and class differences in general really showed an unflattering side this year.

14. Where did most of your money go?
tuition and los boyos, therapy, Drake, basically Tomas.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
The election, and Obama totally taking it.  And also, that I did remarkably well at school.

16. What song will always remind you of 2008?
Ring of Fire by Johnny Cash, as that is what we got married to.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder?
Happier fo' sho'.
b) thinner or fatter?
Immense is not an option, but for me it should be.
c) richer or poorer?
way way way poorer. 

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Spending time with friends.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Wasting time on the Internet?  Did I just admit to that?!

20. How did you spend Christmas?
With my faves-

21. Did you fall in love in 2008?
Yes I did.  I fall in love with Cory all the time.

22. What was your favorite TV program?
Pushing Daisies is it for me!  Oh, and Project Runway.  And The First 48, and Cold Case Files.  Maybe I should change my answer for 19.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Nope- still hate them.

24. What was the best book you read?
Hmmm, I read a lot this year.  This is tricky.  I really liked Nervous Conditions, I really liked the Dust Bowl book, there were so many of them, I honestly can't pick.

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?
All of the music we picked up down south.  I heart all of it.

26. What did you want and get?
To get knocked up again.

27. What did you want and not get?
oh man.

28. What was your favorite film of this year?
Milk.  But that could be because I just saw it.  I loved it.

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
Vegas!  Went to the Wynn with the hubby.  We saw LOVE, the Beatles show.  Man oh man.  I am now one more year closer to 30.  I'm close, we'll leave it at that.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Who knows?  I don't know.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
This meme is looooonggggg.

32. What kept you sane?
Keeping my eyes on the prize. Always.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
I don't know.  They are just people too.

34. What political issue stirred you the most?
Oh my word, this year?  Name something.

35. Who did you miss?
I miss my mom so much, everyday.  I miss living close to her.

36. Who was the best new person you met?
Sharayah.  Then she moved. Of course.  

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.
Be pliable and adaptable.  And nothing is really as big as it seems at first.  Just take a moment and look around, and you're good.  You just gotta get out of that box for a minute, and it is not as scary.

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
I am cheating- it is not a song, it is a movie quote-

"All he needs is two Sundays worth of sermons in Orange Fucking County".  
Nailed it.

Happy New Years guys-

xoxo,
The Ever Expanding J.Danger

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Dramatic? or Comedic?

The winner of the James Patterson Hanukkah giveaway is-


Congrats Serena!  I hope you enjoy it.  I see you have him on your blog today!  Email me your snail mail address so that I can get it out to you!

Thanks guys- that was a lot of fun.


Look at what the boys left me from their lunch today-



Those boys!

xoxo-
The ever expanding J.Danger