Nose Candy on Easter

Sooooooo, here we are.  Let's see....

Last week we had Passover!  Lots of eating!

Then we had Cory's Trailer Park Birthday Party.  Lots of fun, and also lots of eating!

Then we had Easter- Lots of eating, tons of people, and a trip to Urgent Care because Oliver shoved Reeses Pieces up his nose.  Too far up his nose.  Right after the (brand new) garbage disposal went out on us.

But really, I could care less because my mom came to visit. 

 She brought a thousand course meal, complete with 500 different dessert 

options.  I did not need to do anything!  It was amazing.  I was so burnt out from Passover and Cory's party, and a gazillion papers due before the week was out, so she did everything.  I just sat around and ate and gazed lovingly at my mother.  Till she told me that I was HUGE and my hair looked dingy.

Just kidding.

But not.

Best highlight ever from the past two weeks that I have been M.I.A?

THE WASHING MACHINE CAME ON MONDAY!  I cannot even tell you how dang excited I am to no longer have to wash our clothes in the bath tub.  Because do you know how much work that is?!  Washing them all- BY HAND- rinsing them all- BY HAND- and then wringing them all out- BY HAND- and then they are still so wet that I need to put them in the dryer twice each time, at least.  I swear- I would have been pissed all the time if I lived like on the wild Frontier or something.  AND HOW!

Speaking of Frontier women- something else happened this week, too.

I FREAKING EXPLODED.

Big as a bread box.

So now that we are all caught up, I have leftover pie to eat.

XOXO,

J.Danger

After an entire week of eating...

The contest for the ROCKSTARMOM maternity shirt is done-zo.  Thanks so much to everyone that played.  I used Random.org to chose a number for me.  See?

The winner is...

Jamie Willow said...

I really liked the Floating Baby Hoodie. Super cute stuff.

So Jamie- congrats!  Email me your snail mail info so I can get you your shirt.  Oh, and size too please!

Thanks friends.

XOXO,

J.Danger

GIVEAWAY! T-Shirt from Rockstar Mom Maternity!

ROCKSTARMOM started with a woman named Leah Brumley and her sewing machine and worked it's way up to an awesome company with maternity wear for awesome pregos.

All of their clothing is made from the finest products and materials.  Their rock shirts are created and sewn from licensed products- all going back to support the artists.

All of the original designs are her own, so you won't find them anywhere else.

They also have a baby line full of rockin' wearables for your future rock star, a Yoga line, an EcoMama line, all sorts of cool things!

ROCKSTAR MOMS has been featured in Pregnancy Magazine, Beauty & Style, The Momsquawk Blog, TheDailyStroll.com, Maternity & Style, NBC, and In Style on Daytime.

Leah and her ROCKSTAR MOM maternity clothes are so rad that she has offered up one of her own ORIGINAL Tees for one of my readers to have themselves! 

This shirt is her very own "Floating Baby Tee".  ****PLEASE NOTE- the shirt you will receive will be black, NOT BLUE***** which if you ask me, is even better!

Here is what I need you to do to enter-   Go to their site- Rockstarmoms.com and check it out.  Then come back and leave me a comment telling me what your favorite item was, or what you just can't live without.  That's all, presto bango- you're entered.  I will pull a winner next Monday, the 13th- in the evening (ish).  So you have a whole week of intense trepidation until I announce the winner!

***extra ways to enter*****

1. Twitter about this contest

2.  Blog about this contest

3.  Follow my own blog, This Dangerous Life.

4.  Friend them on the Space

You can enter as many ways as you want, just leave me separate comments for each entry, with links if applicable.

Thanks friends!  Good luck.

Rock on-

J.Danger

A few things in summation

1.  Yesterday my washer burned up.  It is practically BRAND NEW!  This makes me angry because I really like having a washing machine, and I would hate to think that it went on the fritz because it felt overwhelmed and taken advantage of.  Washing machine- I love you.  Come back to me- please!

2.  Do you know how hard it is to NOT have a washing machine when you a two year that is potty training (read: pee and/or poop ALL THE TIME) and a pre-teen that constantly gets bloody noses (read: roughly 5 minutes after the washer died, allllllll over his pillow that I now CANNOT WASH!).

3.  Tomas had an asthma attack yesterday at school.  Any parent knows how much these phone calls SUCK, no matter how calm, cool, and in control you may appear.  Then, to further exasperate the situation I needed to take my laundry to the MIL's to rewash and then dry after the washer fiasco.  So I took my son right back to the scene of the asthma crime, with her beloved darling Chow Chow Emma Baby, whom we love, but has now been sentenced to the cold, hard  outside world.

4.  Yesterday I freakishly cut the bottom of my foot open on a yucky old furniture nail from our (super awesome and RAD) vintage Gold ottoman.  Almost two hours later on hold with the after hours nurse, I need to miraculously find time today to get a shot in my (ever increasing) ass.

5.  I am missing Tom's walk through the American Revolution performance today at school and I am sad that Cory is not going and no one will be there to clap for him when he is done.  I feel like a bad parent today.

6.  I am so unbelievably overwhelmed with school right now that I spend more time kicking myself in the ass and mentally berating myself than I do homework, because I can't even function properly at the moment.  Read- I am an idiot.

7.  I just want someone, ANYONE, to please commit to and FINISH the illustration for my book.  I am ready to be done with it!

8.  I am tired- and Oliver keeps missing the memo that mommy is pregnant, and tired, tired, tired, and it is NOT productive to keep waking her up every two hours EVERY GOD DAMN night.

Thats all I got for now.  I don't think that I should keep going as crying like a baby at school would probably be unprofessional, seeing as how I need to be in front of my class in an hour!

UGH!

Oh wait!  This one is good- over the weekend Cory was at an art show and up on display was our good friends sketch book.  His name is Lindsey Carmichael and he is an amazing artist.  His sketchbook is on roses, and one of the tattoos he has done for me is on display in the exhibit.I am up on display!  Pretty sweet!

xoxo,

J.Danger

Penis or Vagina?

PENIS.

Alas my friends, I am and shall continue to be, the only female in the house.

The Danger Family will be gladly welcoming a THIRD boy, this august!

Here is a list of the reasons why having a THIRD boy in the house will surely rock-

1. I can just give up cleaning my house from here on out. I mean come on, why even bother anymore?

2.  I get to spit and scratch my crotch whenever I want from now on, because if I don't I will merely be the odd man out.

3.  We will not have to buy anything for this little guy, because somehow I knew this was coming and saved EVERYTHING.  So really, we are doing ourselves a favor.

4.  I WILL NEVER HAVE TO PAY FOR A WEDDING.

5.  Period talk?  Nope.  Not gonna happen.

6.  In fact, no sex talk at all.  Helllllllllo Husband.  Although, I will admit- this frightens me a little.

7.  It is ok for boys to look like ragamuffins- they're boys!  So I don't have to worry about making them look cute, color coordinated, and well put together.

8.  I won't have to run nearly as fast when I hear screaming or "BLOOD" or "Moms coming!  RUN" because I will already know exactly what is going on.  They're boys.

9.  It will be considered acceptable when there are lizards, squirrels, dirt, sand, boogers, rusty trucks, and stray army men body parts loosely strewn around the house.

10.  We get to have another Bris, which is cool because everyone at Temple will cook for us. (I knew there was a reason we joined!)

So there ya have it.  Another boy.  And we are stoked!

xoxo,

(carrying yet another penis) J. Danger

WW: 18 weeks

I know, I know- WORDLESS Wednesday.  But whatever!

Big news today guys!  Bigger than me even.  Check back in later.

xoxo,

J.danger

So I know I said I wasn't that kind of girl, but...

I totally am.

I did it.

And I don't feel nearly as dirty as I thought I would.

In fact, I kinda like it.

Calm down mom (hello? 3 kids ma!)

I joined Facebook (it's a social network mom.  Yes, a social network.  No- not like Bunco mom).

Now, to be honest, I was on Facebook for awhile a year or two ago.  But it was still pretty new, I couldn't figure it out, I was sick of my inbox being flooded with stupid requests, I was done with it.

So I closed the account, stuck with the Space, and forgot all about it.

Until everyone else started doin it.

So I caved, and I joined the masses.

So far, so good.  We will see.  I just need to turn off my email notifiers because oh my word I have never gotten as much email as I do now.  Geesh!  

So there ya have it.

I did it.  And I liked it.

xoxo,

J.Danger

P.s.- Carl's Jr. YOU SUCK and I am peeved at you.  But still too peeved to talk about it RATIONALLY so I am waiting to responsibly blog about it.  Quite unlike your mega-irresponsible ad campaign right now!