Thursday, February 19, 2009

Dear Sinus Infection-

Here's the thing.  I understand how awesome and cozy my head must obviously be, seeing as how this is your third stay at Hotel Jessica in only two months.  So obviously, I must be totally awesome.  But you know what- I am taking my pineapple back my friend.  You are not welcome here!  This is the worst weekend ever for you to come and cozy on up in all my canals- because I have a TON of work, I am teaching tomorrow, and am home alone TILL MONDAY with los Boyos, and frankly- I just don't like you.  You are gross.  You stink.  You leave a mess everywhere.  And you make me look like a mongoloid.  Not that I have anything against mongoloids, cuz I totally don't, but still....come on! 

Pack your bags sir- and get the hell out!

Thank you so kindly,
J. Danger

7 comments:

Minimeltdown said...

Haven't heard the word "mongoloid" in about 30 years! Feel better. Sickness sucks. End of story. But especially when you have kids to take care of.

musicjunkie said...

Try sitting over a pot of boiling water (or some other contraption that creates steam) and breath in the steam, it may not be complete relief, but it helps, even if only for a little while.

And I usually associate the word mongoloid with Vin Diesel, lol.

The Food Librarian said...

Oh dear. I had a sinus infection last month and I heart the Z pack of antibiotics. I think the Neti-pot is helpful in, well, keeping things moist and getting things outta there.

GET OUT!! (that is me yelling at your sinus infection)

Gentle Reader said...

I'm fighting with a sinus infection, too. I think I've been in denial about it, but now I'm following your lead and I'm going to tell it to get out!

Brittany said...

UGH! We all just went through this, and I finally broke down and got a anti-histamine from the doctor. It really helped! Feel better!

Minimeltdown said...

About that book, I'm so glad he put his foot down. I would not have wanted you to spend any amount on shipping and I'd offer to reimburse you but then my husband would freak. So no worries. It was a really nice thought. I'll at least tell my friend about it and give her the link in case she wants to get it for herself. Then...everyone's happy!

Leslie said...

LOL LOL LOL..this was a seriously funny post!